Life

Robert. B. Payne...Eat A Dick

I am a school teacher who owns a house.  Dumb, I know, but I feel like a managed to get a piece of real estate at the low end of the market.  Hopefully I will be able to sell when the market rebounds.  Or it might not, and I will be totally F--ed.  Whatever.

Owning a house is a black hole for money.  It is.  A big reason it is is because of complete douchebags like the folks at Robert B. Payne.  These people really tried to ram it in me without lube.

Long story short, the heat in my house stopped, and being the handyman that I am, I tore the front cover off of my furnace to find the problem.  The blower motor went bad.  I could tell easily because the thing wasn't spinning.  I went on amazon.com to find the motors for around 100$.  I did not know exactly how to install the motor, so here came mistake #1, calling Robert. B. Payne (and getting sucked in by that ridiculous jingle).

The guy comes to the house while Im at work and calls me, telling me what I already know.  How much to fix it?  $690.

After I shit my pants, I asked how the hell can installing a $100 motor cost 700 bones?  He reads down the list:  Diagnostic fee (I had already told him what was wrong...$90), Requisition fee ($100), Transportation fee ($25) Motor ($400??) Installation fee, ($75).  I told the guy I would call him back, and had a minor panic attack.

Thank sweet Jesus that my maintenence guy was standing outside my classroom that day.  He asked me what was wrong, and I gave him the short version.  What followed out of his mouth was a series of f-words, but at the end of his profane rant, I made out the phrase..."gimme 200$, I'll get all the parts and put it in for free".  I wanted to kiss him.  All he wanted for his work was a bottle of cheap bourbon.  Done.

I spent a total of 225 dollars to fix my furnace, which now runs like a champ.  How businesses can so blatantly rip off customers by over charging like this is beyond me.  How they stay in business without being blown up by s suitcase bomb is also beyond me.  They need to be burnt to the ground and have me take a big shit all over their ashes.  If you own a house, get to know a handy man, and make sure there is a liquor store nearby.  Robert B. Payne (and all like them) can suck my hairy left nut.

Josh