Everybody gets a Trophy

Alright I'll come out and admit it even before we get started.  I sucked at Little League, as do most kids in America, I learned early in life that baseball wasn't my sport.  But this issue shows the problem with the American psyche. This issue is the original reason that we started this blog, so I'm going to try to give it justice.

Everyone getting a trophy is leading our country into being a nation of pussies.  Life is about winners and losers, there are people in this world that make a hell of a lot of money, people that do okay, people that slave for the man and get shitted on (me, Kevin, Josh), and people that live under bridges and have no teeth (hopefully this is never us, but life has no guarantees).  This is the truth: winners in life, on the baseball field, in the classroom, making music etc. are motivated by several different things but perhaps the greatest is the fear or the lesson learned from failure.

            Failure is the greatest lesson in life ask any great leader, business person, athlete, priest, anyone.....failure teaches us what we need to work on, what we need to improve etc. I know that these kids are only 9, 10, 11,  and 12 years old, and I'm not advocating that the last place team should stand there as the winners through rocks at them.  But the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, last place teams should have it explained to them that they didn't do well  (aka they sucked, you don't tell a 9-12 year old this though you think it) and what they need to work on for next time, in a positive manner but you do not reward someone for losing or failing.

          This bullshit pussy idea that everyone is a winner no matter how they act or what they do started in little league with this bullshit, but now is continuing slowly into our society.  Now in some high schools they don't have a failing grade saying that rather students will move on at their own pace.  This is a novel idea, but you can't tell a 14-17 year old that if they don't try at all they can't fail, it doesn't prepare them at all for life, not to mention that you aren't going to learn shit.

            Take yourself back to when you where in high school imagine that your teacher tells you, that no matter what you do you cannot fail, would you ever learn anything or just try to hang out, and look cool.

            Imagine Thomas Edison just giving up on making a fucking light bulb (it took him hundreds of failures) maybe we should have given him a trophy every time.

             You wonder why our nation is heading toward a nation of obese, uneducated, slobs that can't move out of their mother's basement at the age of 30.  I'll tell you because no one has kicked them in the ass and told them that if you want to survive in this world you have to succeed, and the only way you succeed is by learning from failures, correcting them and improving yourself.

Drew

Pharmaceutical commercials

Okay people... got a problem that we need to address.  We believe in freedom in this country a great and novel idea.  However their are some limitations that we put on this freedom which I agree with you can't go streaking through the park on a whim. You can't get a firearm if your a convicted felon. You do steroids to increase your academic performance(unless your making your owner a ton of money). Well we need to add one to the list. There is no way in hell that Pharmaceutical companies should ever...ever....ever be allowed to make commercials.

    I am already positive that 99.9% of Americans agree with idea but I'll continue anyway and break it down:
         
1.   We are one of two countries in the world that allow this along with New Zealand (not exactly the best company)

          2. Pharmaceutical companies spend tens of billions of dollars advertising drugs. Which you may say is within their right, which is true however this increases the drugs cost. So you think no big deal I got insurance well guess what. The cost rises to your employer and they up and get rid of health insurance, or they go to the absolute horrible plan.

           3. Your not a fucking doctor you never went to medical school you have no idea what this drugs do, or if they even fucking work, for your condition.

            4. Doctors are now pressured to recommend certain drugs from both the companies and the patients, a good doctor will tell you frankly what the deal is, a bad one will give you everything you want to keep your uninformed dumb ass happy.

           5. Have you actually seen the advertisements they are horrible.  They have some old ass guy talking about talking about sexual interaction (I think we all know, have a supermodel try to sell it to me might work better)
           6. Side effects have you heard some of the symptoms Vomiting, headaches cramps, mood swings, gambling urges(no bullshit this is one, it might be fun), erections that last longer than four hours (sweet), and my favorite gas with oily discharge (who was the guy that came up with that one very professional medical lingo)

           7.  Now companies spend more time making us drugs that prevent baldness, give us bonners, etc. instead of developing shit that could save our life one day.

Drew

MOMENT OF SILENCE.................. FOR SPERRIES

CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING?

im not going to lie... back in the day, about 7 years ago i bought the girl that i was dating at the time a pair of sperries.  but back then they were new and not everyone in america between 8 and 25 had a pair.  but dont we think that they have run their course? i mean how many people are going to rock them? every kid in middle school has them, including the emo kids who are all blacked out with a hoodie, super skinny jeans, and SPERRIES!! haha. what is the deal?

if you are thinking about buying a pair of sperries ask yourself these questions:

... am i a boat captain?
... do i want to be made fun of by kevin ?
... are these shoes way played out?
... why am i wearing leather with laces?
... whats that smell? (oh its my friend next to me with stankin ass feet, thats wearing sperries!!)

i guess this rant doesnt have much of a point but ive been a irked by these shoes for way too long. so please god people unite and get rid of sperries, unless youre a boat captain that is.

kevin

FLO--- THE EVER ANNOYING CHICK FROM PROGRESSIVE

CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING?

i really cant stand the chick FLO from progressive. is it necessary to have the girl in every commercial that they come up with? is the marketing team for progressive inept at coming up with other ideas? im going to make a list of the most annoying things about these stupid commercials.

1. stupid background music (makes me want to drown myself)
2. the price gun (LLLAAA, yeah we're the only ones that do!!)
3. calculator humor (HELLO) gotta love the calculator humor ( i may or may not have done that when i was in    elementary school, just saying)
4. 400 vtwin (there is no way you can make FLO look cool in any way with a motorcycle)

here is the extra punishment that the xm gods have bestowed upon me...

as if it wasn't bad enough seeing her way to much on tv, i get to HEAR her and the stupid song on espn radio when I'm riding in the car.  im sorry, i want to hear colin cowherd, mike and mike, or scott van pelt, not FLO.
espn.... get your act together, my ears are bleeding and i may run off the road and die one day bc i cant take it anymore.  so for my safety and those who feel the same, please get rid of FLO and progressive.

kevin

What was Oregon thinking?

        I stayed up on Monday to watch a pathetic excuse for a supposed national championship game, played between Cam $200,000 Newton and the Oregon cheerleading squad (which I might add is ridiculously hot).

(meet the squad wish I was getting recruited)
Forgoing sleep to stay up til Midnight may or may not be in the top ten regrets of my life.  Oregon has had great results this year with the spread offense which I will give them all the credit in the world for.
        But WTF were they thinking you cannot read a fucking Defensive Tackle, especially on the Goal Line especially if his name is Nick Fairley.

(Meet Nick)
Oregon has a unique offensive system in which they tend to read the Defensive Ends to see if they are crashing or if  they are staying home. If they Crash then the QB takes the Ball and runs to the outside if they stay home the QB gives.  This is a concept that works well when you have more speed, then your opponent and you are reading him for OUTSIDE runs. 
        Here is the thought process that the coach's went through. Nick Fairely is the best Auburn player so lets see if we can read him.  Well here is where the problems started. First he's a Defensive Tackle which means he's on the inside of  In practice for 37 Days they probably but some donk Dlineman in there that wasn't allowed to hit the quarterback.  So when they let him run free the read was easy the QB didn't have to worry about getting planted additionally, the lineman didn't posses the speed and vision that Nick does, so in practice everything worked okay and they thought they had something special.
           Well game time comes about and Nick is meaner, faster and with better vision and understanding than Oregon anticipated so now on runs were they are suppose to read Fairley he is right in their face giving them a variety of looks, he was so fast and could turn his shoulders so quickly that it looked like he was going for the runnning back instead he massacred the QB on the goaline. 
           Well wait a second......maybe the Spread Running offensive with all its lateral X's and O's is horrible on the goaline in general. What Oregon needed was a power goaline game to punch it in, as well as get it out of the endzone (the safety).  The Oregon spread offense is a cool looking offense with their cards of Erin Andrews, Battleships and assorted Lego pieces which everyone seems to love, but near the goaline you need to posses a power game that will solidify your game. TCU would have done better btw.

Drew

Robert B. Payne...Eat a Dick

I am a school teacher who owns a house.  Dumb, I know, but I feel like a managed to get a piece of real estate at the low end of the market.  Hopefully I will be able to sell when the market rebounds.  Or it might not, and I will be totally F--ed.  Whatever.

Owning a house is a black hole for money.  It is.  A big reason it is is because of complete douchebags like the folks at Robert B. Payne.  These people really tried to ram it in me without lube.

Long story short, the heat in my house stopped, and being the handyman that I am, I tore the front cover off of my furnace to find the problem.  The blower motor went bad.  I could tell easily because the thing wasn't spinning.  I went on amazon.com to find the motors for around 100$.  I did not know exactly how to install the motor, so here came mistake #1, calling Robert. B. Payne (and getting sucked in by that ridiculous jingle).

The guy comes to the house while Im at work and calls me, telling me what I already know.  How much to fix it?  $690.

After I shit my pants, I asked how the hell can installing a $100 motor cost 700 bones?  He reads down the list:  Diagnostic fee (I had already told him what was wrong...$90), Requisition fee ($100), Transportation fee ($25) Motor ($400??) Installation fee, ($75).  I told the guy I would call him back, and had a minor panic attack.

Thank sweet Jesus that my maintenance guy was standing outside my classroom that day.  He asked me what was wrong, and I gave him the short version.  What followed out of his mouth was a series of f-words, but at the end of his profane rant, I made out the phrase..."gimme 200$, I'll get all the parts and put it in for free".  I wanted to kiss him.  All he wanted for his work was a bottle of cheap bourbon.  Done.

I spent a total of 225 dollars to fix my furnace, which now runs like a champ.  How businesses can so blatantly rip off customers by over charging like this is beyond me.  How they stay in business without being blown up by a suitcase bomb is also beyond me.  If you own a house, get to know a handy man, and make sure there is a liquor store nearby.  Robert B. Payne (and all like them) can suck my hairy left nut.

Josh

Welcome!

I'm Josh, and along with Kev and Drew, we are the founders of CWTAS.  We feel like we are three of the very few sane people left in America!  We look everywhere, on the news, on the radio, everyday experiences, and we have to ask ourselves...has America lost its damn mind??  We think it has...and we are here to give you a laugh or two as we explore the depths of just how b-ass-ackwards our society has really become!